Sunday, March 4, 2012

Best Man Speech Notions From A Real Best Man



First I have to say I’m no grand expert on best man speeches, but I have given a couple of best men speeches in my time. If you are not comfortable standing in front of a group who may or may not be on the best terms with each other, then you are in for a long lonely walk. Luckily people in my profession spend a bit of time in front of crowds and can bring that experience to nearly any event.
One of the most important things you have to keep in mind while preparing a best man speech is know your audience. And that’s really true with any speech, but most importantly with best man speeches. If you’re giving your presentation before family and friends of the couple and you know in advance that it’s a tense gathering (due to conflicts between families, or sometimes even the couple) do not try to lighten the mood with a little joking around. Don’t talk about funny situations the couple have been through, or poke fun at the groom for his lack of grooming experience or the bride’s bad choice in men. Really, just get right to the point. This has to be your typical ‘These two are so meant for each other. They’re a great couple” best man speech, raise your glass and promptly sit yourself down. If you don’t follow this simple rule during your best man speech, it’s a promise you’ll fall right on your face and bring the awkward level in the room up a notch or two. There’s nothing worse than giving a speech and watching the faces on your audience slide from indifference to disdain. That’s when during a best man speech you better hope your deodorant lives up to its claims.
On the other hand if you have sized up your audience for your best man speech, found that they have an overall jovial attitude, and you have known both the groom and bride for a number of years and are one of their best friends, then almost any subject is fair game . The best man speech should be personal and humorous, but not to the point of vulgarity. You’ll know vulgarity in a best man speech if the speaker rambles on in a slightly drunken state for what seems like forever, and eventually the mention of bodily fluids is mentioned. If at this point there is a gasp heard from the grimacing group of family and friends you will know a line has been crossed and some form of vulgarity has found its way into the best man speech. You can bet that this speech will be talked about for years to come at nearly every family gathering the couple attends.
The best man speech needs to be woven with both short quips about the couple, and the two individually, and longer stories about the two which build to a point where the crowd is on the edge of their seats needing to know how the situation resolved itself. With these stories there must be a bit of self-deprecating humor. A quick story about yourself which involves the couple during an embarrassing moment during the best man speech will let the group know just why you were chosen as the best man, and how lucky the couple is to have you as a friend. You also need to be always warm with best man speeches. There really is nothing worse during a best man speech than to have the best man communicating in a still, non-personal way about the couple to people in the room. Though I’m no advocate of drinking for the sole sake of having fun, it is not a bad idea for the best man to have a couple of shots of fine Scotch before the best man speech. It loosens the tongue of the speaker and make for a much smoother, even flowing best man speech. The only thing you need to look out for is having too many tips of the jigger. No one wants to hear a best man speech from a slurring best man who needs the help of the table corner to keep him up right.
Finally, and probably most importantly, the best man speech needs to be brimming with love. Because that’s why this group has come together in the first place. That’s not to say that the best man speech needs to be all airy, and filled with trite clichés which have been used in every other best man speech. But the best man needs to talk of it.
The best man has to interlace the word and the feeling of love throughout the best man speech. Sometimes a best man speech need only rely on the warmth and poise of the speaker to convey his and the attending groups feelings towards the couple.
So, as a final word, just have fun if you’re the one picked to deliver the best man speech. The day is all about the wedding couple and really when it comes right down to it if you deliver a good best man speech it’s the last thing that will be remembered by majority of the audience. So, enjoy being the best man and have a wonderful time.

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